A Few More Days Off Work, and Some Helpful Hints:

The word that best describes the last few days is: frustration.

Throughout this process, I've had a plan. Surgery on Monday, a week to recover, and back to work the following Monday. If you know me at all, you know that I have often been described as a workaholic, especially since my move to Austin. I work in a high-stress, high-energy environment that requires me to be "on my game" at all times. I'm constantly answering phones, filling shifts, and playing therapist to families and nurses all while penny-pinching. I love it. The days go by quickly for the most part, and more times than not I really feel like I'm making a difference.

I happily went back to work on Monday of this week. However, I was exhausted before I made it to  lunch. Even getting ready that morning was tiring. I was surprised that I had to take breaks as I made my way through my morning routine, eventually making me late on my first day back. By noon, I had to ask to leave. I came home and slept the rest of the afternoon, waking up for about an hour that evening to drink a shake and check my email. I gave it another shot on Tuesday, but things ended the same way. This time, I decided to be honest with myself: I was just not ready. I submitted my PTO for the rest of the week, and left feeling exhausted and defeated.

So, on to my current mission: finding a protein powder that doesn't make me want to barf and allows me to keep up my energy throughout the day. I've had recommendations for one brand at Costco, and another at Whole Foods. I'm planning to borrow a friend's Costco card this weekend to check them both out, and I'll report back once I have more info. Getting my protein intake under control has to be the key to boosting my energy level and stamina. My goal is to get this sorted out during these days off, so that Monday will be doable. Wish me luck, because I HAVE to get back to work. My coworkers are picking up my slack while I'm away, but it's a big time for our team, and I feel overwhelmingly guilty for not being there.

I promise that I'm trying to be positive. The good news is that physically I'm about 95% with no incision pain or nausea. I'm still battling some aches and pains, but I think it's gas related. Sleeping is much easier these days, and I'm finally able to rest on my stomach again. Thank goodness!  There are also a few things that have really been helpful during my recovery period, and I want to share some of them with you.

First, there's Pinterest. I know this sounds crazy, but I've been pinning the heck out of some food. Some have said that I'm just torturing myself, but actually it's been pretty satisfying for me. I'm not really hungry, so my hunger pains have been quelled by reading through recipes that I find particularly mouth-watering, and saving them for later when I have the ability to actually taste them. It's been like therapy almost, and even though I don't know how healthy the process really is, I'd recommend it either way. There are some great protein ideas out there as well, some that I would have never thought of. I've been able to find some alternative foods that I hope will very soon replace my shake regime. I'd venture to guess that I'm not the only one who finds this site useful, because there's a plethora of Gastric bypass resources out there as well including recipes, blogs, and success stories.


Next, Gas-X thin strips have been a life-saver! After surgery, they told me that I needed to walk to work the excess gas out of my system. Being the overachiever that I am, when they told me to walk for 20 minutes, I did 2 laps around the outside of the hospital. Hey, it was a nice day! Gas-X helps me in my everyday life when walking that much may not be an option. They dissolve on your tongue (which is great since I'm having a bit of trouble swallowing pills), and they don't taste terrible. In fact, they even freshen your breath at the same time, so they double as a breath mint! Over the past few days I've had some shoulder pain, and I've found that two strips plus a dose of Tylenol helps big time. This is a must-have for anyone having surgery, in my humble opinion.



The last one is a bit sentimental, I know, but since yesterday was National Love Your Pet Day (I don't even know if that's a real thing, but Facebook said yes, so it must be true) I have to tell you that having my dogs here to snuggle up with has been fabulous. As a single girl living alone, I feel much better with Wally and Penny here to have my back. They know when I'm not feeling well, and they're being extra sweet. Especially since my parents went back to Tennessee, I don't know what I'd do without them.

Anyways, I'm off. I hope you all are doing well. I've had so many messages and emails about friends who have had, are scheduled to have, or are considering bariatric surgery. Ladies, please don't ever be embarrassed of your goals. We'll get through this together! Keep me updated, and I'll keep you updated as well.

Days Since Surgery: 10
Current Weight: 333
Total Pounds Lost: 17

Sh*! is Getting Real:

Note to self: calling something a "cake walk" is just asking for trouble.

I'm just about a full week out, and while I'm healing beautifully, I am incredibly frustrated. First, on the outside I am just about back to normal. The glue has come off 5 of my seven surgical sites, and I'm moving around just fine. My parents went home to Tennessee on Saturday morning, and I was even able to go out for a pedicure with a friend that afternoon. However, my inside is obviously not as far along in the healing process as my outside. I can still feel every ounce of food or liquid that I take in, and my chest aches with every. single. swallow.

Now for the part of the entry where Holly makes all the wrong decisions: I got a bit big for my britches on Saturday afternoon when I got home. I had choked down a protein shake that morning, and was doing great with my fluid intake. I'd even managed to take most of my supplements for the day, so I got ahead of myself. I had some potato soup in the cabinet that looked delicious, and without fully thinking it through I popped it open and heated it up. Now looking back, this was a terrible decision and just about the worst food I could have picked. White potatoes in a thick cream sauce? I deserved to pay for that poor judgement. But it was RIGHT THERE, and contained BACON, and I had had nothing solid in almost 6 days.  I obviously wasn't thinking clearly.

It started out fine, and I felt sure things were going to be just great until about half way in. I dropped my spoon, felt my heart start to race, and broke out in a sweat. I immediately reached for some water and made my way to the bed where I immediately called my mom. Bless her heart, she talked me through the whole ordeal and didn't even laugh once. We decided that no, the choice of a pure starch first meal was not the smartest, and that I'd probably been so excited that I ate way too fast. In my defense, I  thought that I'd surely feel when I needed to stop, but I have to learn my own body's signs and that's taking me some time.

I actually spent the rest of Saturday in bed, and didn't feel quite "okay" until Sunday afternoon, wherein of course I decided to make another questionable choice. Dang-it  you guys, I'm so over liquids, and if you mention another protein shake to me I may just throw it at your head. I'm so hungry! Well, that's not true, I just miss food. Anyways, I tried to eat a scrambled egg on Sunday, and naturally, that didn't go well either. I got about three bites down and my stomach abruptly said "NO!". I listened this time, even though that was a great egg. Maybe the best I'd ever had. The after effects weren't as bad as the day before, but my stomach definitely ached for the next few hours, and I went back to bed. I can't keep going through this silly cycle, so I'm just going to suck it up and stick to water/broth/shakes until my first post-op appointment at least. That's scheduled for Wednesday morning, so it's not too long to wait, and I'm not getting my hopes up. If I'm still having this much trouble with anything solid, he'll most likely keep me on liquids for a while longer. Fine.

Have you guys seen that new fried fish sandwich from Wendy's? I'd like that in my mouth immediately. Sigh. Yes, my actual surgery was "cake", but the rest of this is harder than I ever imagined it would be. The good news is I'm heading back to work tomorrow. Thank goodness! I hope that these phantom cravings will subside or at least pretend to be under control while my mind is focused on other things. My goal is to make it a full day, but I may be looking at half-days at first. We shall see!

Days since Surgery: 6
Current Weight: 339
Total Pounds Lost: 11

And So It Begins:

Hi! I'm Holly! I'm a 29 year old single, workaholic gal living in Austin, Texas. I've had five or so blogs over the past ten years, so I'm hoping this one sticks. It's nice to have a place to archive the important things in life, the great days, and even the things that don't work out so well.

A little about me... I'm a self-diagnosed drama queen who claims to hate drama. I love fashion and beauty/style magazines and blogs, but I rarely wake up in time to make any magic happen in the mornings. I work far too many hours at a job that I unfortunately love, and see myself working my way up the corporate ladder in years to come, which is surprising for a girl with an art degree and a background in teaching. Also I use a lot of commas. You'll all just have to get used to this.

And of course there is one other thing... on February 11, 2013 I had gastric bypass surgery. Way to bury the lead, Holly. I'm about five days out at this point and to be honest, so far it's been a cake walk (did someone say cake?). Admittedly I probably didn't do as much planning beforehand as I should have. My mom came to take care of me (a 12 hour journey from Tennessee to Texas), and not only is she a nurse, but she had her own weight loss surgery about a year ago so she was definitely the best person to have around. Plus you know, she's my mom, and when you're going through major surgery you kind of want your mommy.

So right now I'm tackling what all bariatric surgery patients do: the gross protein shakes, the chew-able supplements that are required and also taste like a mixture of sawdust and bathroom cleaner, and trying to feign excitement over the clear liquid diet that I can enjoy for the next two weeks. You know those people who say that after surgery they don't want food at all? The ones who are nauseated by the mere smell of foods they once loved? I am not one of those people, people. My parents have been lovely: sneaking out to meals while I'm resting and not bringing back leftovers, but it's no use. I have the pains for food, even though I am not hungry at all. I even make them describe their dinners to me. It's bad, folks. I've been doing great so far, focusing on my shakes and supplements, but it's amazing when you begin to realize just how much of your life revolves around food. It's sad really.

I'll keep this site updated with my journey because I think it's a good resource to hear from a real person going through the process. Have I mentioned I've already started bookmarking cutesy/cheap clothes from online boutiques that I plan to have in my closet ASAP? Yes that will happen soon, and you'll be part of it, don't you worry. However for now I'm going to go take a dose of pain meds so that I pass out instead of looking at cinnamon roll recipes on Pinterest. Don't judge me, guys. One day at a time.

Weight before Surgery: 350
Days Since Surgery: 5
Current Weight: 342